Just stuff I thought was funny

Spending my downtime when not designing maps reading old Doomworld posts...
It's fun to catch up on things I surely missed. When somebody tickled my funny, I made a note of it. Here's what I've got so far:

The best movie ever is Alien. You cannot disagree, unless you like being wrong.

EarthQuake's profile, About Me tab

August 2nd, 2002

I store all my pwads in an airtight container.

stphrz

March 3rd, 2003

I don't see why using doom95 is a problem. If someone is harassing you because of the engine you use call the DOOM Player Rights Association, they will help you learn to tell them to fuck off.

myk

May 5th, 2003

Plus don't expect much out of the Doom community. If I've learned anything it's that the Doom community is a bunch of tardbiscuits.

Nanami

August 27th, 2003

Geoshitties is run by a bunch of tralks.

Fletcher`

December 10th, 2003

I'm glad to have my Pussy Builder, I mean Doom Builder. ;)

Doom_Dude

January 10th, 2004

The Zdaemon community as a whole is garbage save for a *VERY* few individuals...

SirTimberWolf

February 16th, 2004

This is a discussion about about Romero's career development, it is important to note that LEGOS SUCK ASS!!!!

bartwart

April 8th, 2004

I'm not sure if it's a good idea to merge aliens with nazis.

Vegeta

March 7th, 2005

I once told a girl I made RTC-3057 so she would have sex with me.

kristus

May 27th, 2005

wel dud 1st ya gots to git 4um prgram to make em then u gots to um get a wad thing and pallete and XWE OH DUD LOL u got 2 c action doom lol it has sum1 else werk u can jus steal ROFL

Use

August 4th, 2005

Well it's a porn wad so it's pretty high up the pointless scale, after all, you need two hands to play the game properly

RjY

August 21st, 2005

I tried it, and seriously, I would have rather have gotten a virus than the map I saw.

    Devilofdoom said:

    whats wrong with it? 

You need to open the options menu in your wad editor and set "Suck" to off.

Vile1011

October 30th, 2009

Before late 1997, the Boom engine actually insisted on Ultimate Doom being called DOOMU.WAD for the 4th episode to work.

Super Jamie

February 4th, 2010

You can use commander keens in any level, not just MAP32. Therefore, all levels should use commander keens

Gez

February 23rd, 2010

I'm making 'Deus Vendetta Alien Hell Vult Revealed 18' so my wad shows up on idgames whenever anyone searches for those terms. The maps are 32 of the best maps from alien vendetta, hell revealed and deus vult, with all things and lines rotated 90 degrees, thus making them my own original creations. All copyrighted textures were replaced with various images of the Fonz from Happy Days.

gggmork

July 30th, 2010

Fuck DECORATE. DECORATE has nothing to do with Doom. ZDoom is an entire different branch. It's like teaching probability in a geometry class.

40oz

August 25th, 2010

WADs like this make Jesus kill kittens.

boris

September 1st, 2010

You should smash in your friends face, because Bon Jovi is annoying. The moment i would hear that shit out of a pwad, it got deleted from my harddisk.

cybdmn

October 14th, 2010

Day 3: After escaping the secret underwater acid mine that is actually a demon gateway but we don't know that because it's a secret the doom marine is relocated to a space station that harvests fried chicken from the sun but not so fast! The sun is actually an icon of sin! Doom Marine needs to kill the sun.

Craigs

December 27th, 2010

What to do when you have no mapping skills? Start a major project and elect yourself Team Leader.

<ducks, runs and hides>

GreyGhost

January 6th, 2011

As long as you feel that some cool, creepy WAVs would find happy homes in WADs, I think it'd be a blast to spend an evening in my little home studio making horrifying noises. I'd have to contact the downstairs neighbors first, though, so that they don't worry when they hear me chanting, roaring, screaming, stomping, and ripping massive bloodfarts.
...as pinky demons do.

ArchitectofHell

April 11th, 2011

Is it strange that when I saw a thread by gggmork called "crapmap" my first reaction was "awesome!"...?

Grain of Salt

August 24th, 2011

my fave moment is ambushing the cyber with the first bfg shot, probably because in half the cases he returns fire while i'm still humping his leg.

dew

August 30th, 2011

A year or two ago, Kate made a deathmatch map that shifts itself between Dwango5 map01 and Dwango6 map01 without warning, crushing everything in its path.

esselfortium

September 12th, 2011

your probably better off rebuilding the maps from scratch in the desired format it's like trying to mate an elephant with a giraffe.

Pottus

July 17th, 2012

That nigh-impossible timed secret exit in Scythe 2 can fuck right off.

gun_psycho

July 27th, 2012

I think having a "wad club" on doomworld would be a good idea. I always enjoying discussing levels and stuff with other people. All we need is Oprah to lead it. :P

elic

February 13th, 2013

My first map no longer exists. Which is probably just as well since it was a dark, 64-wide maze stocked with imps and demons and with only a berserk pack as a weapon.

Capellan

July 15th, 2013

"Vanilla" maps that are only tested with Zdoom should be a shooting offence, I swear.

Urban Space Cowboy

November 5th, 2013

i played this really old wad called myhouse.wad

it was 1 map with someones house made into a doom level

chesse20

December 14th, 2013

You don't put every rocket launcher and every plasma gun in every map you make on randomized conveyor belts.

Phml

January 1st, 2014

I liked the IOS in MARSWAR.wad which has a photo of Bill Gates.

Avoozl

January 14th, 2014

Every little blue bottle is sacred. Those little helmets though, can go die in an unfortunate smelting accident for all I care.

Jayextee

January 15th, 2014

I love that temporary blinding effect effect of picking up a stack of goodies (even ammo), it's like taking a delicious deep swig of cold beer.

Kotzugi

January 15th, 2014

I think that when Doomguy goes over 200%, he keeps picking up the powerups to sell later at his lemonade stand.

Krispy

January 17th, 2014

What about maps that use them in an "arrow pattern" in the floor to hint at a secret, for example? I don't remember specific examples, but now every time I see a group of bottles/helmets, I try to make sure they aren't "pointing" to the nearest wall, just in case. And given it rarely happens, I feel it's a waste of time. And that seriously pisses me off.

Zed

January 19th, 2014

This really needs to be front page news or something. Seriously, this is the Doom equivalent of finding the Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, and D. B. Cooper living together.

Rampy470

January 23rd, 2014

I imagine upon hitting the exit switch doomguy and all the monsters immediately break character and stand around chatting and smoking cigarettes until the next map.

mouldy

February 15th, 2014

There was a medieval style RPG mod in the /Newstuff, I nearly reviewed it but it was as hard as fossilised triceratops turd and I didn't want to negatively review something when it had clearly had so much effort put into it.

MajorRawne

March 30th, 2014

That's a horrible opinion and you should feel bad for spreading it.

j4rio

April 12th, 2014

I want a mod that gives Doomguy floral oven mitts.

plums

May 10th, 2014

It is a goddamn shame that most people have probably not played Mega Spider Bitch. Play Mega Spider Bitch.

ClonedPickle

June 12th, 2014

Then there's the issue that people like new music, and finding 32 worthwhile tracks is a complete headache for me, requiring endless hours wading through raw monkeyshit to find a few pearls in a bubbling lake of stinky diarrhea.

Steve D

July 3rd, 2014

Its not pee! Its just... suspious yellow sweat!

Fellowzdoomer

August 23rd, 2014

I do. Yes, I'm a mild cheater whom the purists would burn at the stake.

Demonologist

September 16th, 2014

The story of Doom?

Pick up guns. Big guns. Kill shit. Another day well spent.

Nevanos

September 21st, 2014

The Demons are not really "demons" at all, just a simple under developed society of peace loving folks only doing what they have to do to feed their children as best as they know how with their unfairly low level of resources. Anyone who calls them "Demons" is clearly a racist and a xenophobe and using inherently racist ideology to justify apartheid.

rampancy

October 11th, 2014

Go fast and kill things. Go fast and kill things well enough and you can get NotSuperSaiyan mode and can then go faster and kill even more things even more.

Jaxxoon R

February 28th, 2015

When you start chaining levels together, learn how to replace music in SLADE. Sparing people from having to listen to d_runnin cultivates good will.

baja blast rd.

March 27th, 2015

Had a pretty shitty day at work today. So I'm taking it out on you guys!

General Rainbow Bacon

July 12th, 2015

You see, on Doomworld, users are allowed to troll other new users if it is in the greater interest of upholding the superiority of the Doom community in general over the status of all other games.

Cupboard

July 28th, 2015

once commentary kicks in I usually prefer to just crank the volume up and hold the speakers to my ears in hopes of going deaf to never have to hear another commentary again

Fonze

June 15th, 2016

Calling your map "A sopping great big bag of wet slimy dicks and cunts incorporated" might not be the best idea.

Fuzzball

October 18th, 2017

Comic Sans is like the "Great Value brand" of fonts.

Nevander

January 2nd, 2018

Where do all these sourceports coming from? Spawning vats I suppose.

riderr3

May 25th, 2019

There can never be too many techbase maps.

Graf Zahl

October 1st, 2020

I don't always play coop with my fellas but when I do, I turn the difficulty to nightmare. In Plutonia...

The Lone Wolf

November 11th, 2020

Also, when Doomguy fights the zombieman, he should be naked. All of the other enemies need to have detailed genitalia added to their bodies. I want to believe that everyone appears to be naked when you're a zombieman. Surely I'm not the only one who feels this way.

TheMagicMushroomMan

October 7th, 2021

Originally the level was going to be very different, where it was like the player had been miniaturized and put inside a pool filtration system. But I had problems figuring out how I would actually make a convincing (for the time) level that looked like the inside of a pool pump and filter.

Remilia Scarlet

November 6th, 2021

DOOM is the sine qua non of software. After the kernel, the OS libraries, and the compiler, you must have a working DOOM port. Period.

Dragonker

February 2nd, 2022

Sorry for being a nuisance, but can I get the MOD that Doomguy fully uses his left/right foot to fire weapons and uses his hands to walk? Thanks.

GarrettChan

May 20th, 2022

You removed the ghetto icon of sin though. Not sure how I feel about that.

TheCyberDruid

December 4th, 2022

Too much to quote with this one...

you just need to GO HERE!

January 6th, 2023

I rather run Doom on a pregnancy test than seeing these users quoting themselves and talking to the third person.

Redneckerz

July 30th, 2023

Finally, the myhouse sequel we've all been waiting for

Ralphis

August 17th, 2023

Not sure what's worse, the fact you necro'd a 15 year old thread or the fact your post has no relevance to the topic at hand.

RichardDS90

September 28th, 2023

Fuck the Icon of Sin, place a bunch of barrels and make him die in a single shot.

Lucius Wooding

September 29th, 2023

consistency helps the player. our goal as designers is to fuck the player...

LoatharMDPhD

May 18th, 2024

you should have to have to be issued a license to place spectres in your maps...

SleepyVelvet

May 21st, 2024

...Run like hell and evacuate the facility.
Watch out for the lasers. ...

VICE

July 10th, 2024

Despite the health tweaking, the remaster was what sat me down and made me realise I'd never done Quake on Nightmare before.
Enjoyed every bit of it and both expansions.
Except for the dragon.
Fuck that dragon.
Sideways.

Daytime Waitress

July 12th, 2024

Where can I get kickass.wad and plaidtextures.wad

Parmesian

August 11th, 2024

Everyone responsible for the hitscan Arachnotrons needs to go to jail. No trial, straight to Alcatraz, immediately.

Kinsie

October 21st, 2024

My grandma had a collector's edition of doom...

Tembry-Glintstone

November 6th, 2024

Honestly I dont know who I hate more, the monsters from another dimension or the monsters to which I share ancestry.

Insaneprophet

November 6th, 2024

You can eat soup with your hands, but do you want to?

retzilience

November 6th, 2024

Every night I check under my bed for Romero, knowing one of these days he'll show up for his retribution

famicommander

November 13th, 2024

there is nothing fun with humping walls hoping it starts rising up

rafael2100

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